Category Archives: Features

Opinion: Why Your Ending Sucks

Your ending sucks.

It’s kind of the universal complaint that accompanies most of the biggest games that have come out in the last couple of years. Human Revolution‘s ending was bland, Mass Effect 3‘s was a warcrime thematically, tonally, and structurally. Regardless, most of the endings I’ve seen in the last few years to games have been underwhelming to utterly grotesque. The exceptions  stand out for simple reasons that most people haven’t thought about.


Fair warning, spoilers ahoy. If you haven’t beaten Deus Ex:Human Revolution, Mass Effect 2 or 3, you’ve been warned.

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The Last of Us: Sinners Make the Best Saints



The Last of Us is singularly the best game I’ve played when it comes to the grey areas and hard choices of survival in extreme situations. In a lot of scenarios presented in the game, there’s no clean-cut right answer. In fact, having an easy, moralistic choice would entirely defeat the point of the game. The game is in fact all about the grey areas, and the difference between our current world and the one portrayed in the game….one in which Joel is in a fact a heroic figure.

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Screen-Shaped E3: Ubisoft

Nick: Hey everyone, I’m Nick. I’m parking it early and waiting for Ubisoft. Making some quick commentary on the first looks we have on The Bureau and Beyond: Two Souls.

Nick: The Bureau actually looks interesting. Real-time tactical third-person shooter action with a heavy focus on tactics, a definitive X-COM look, and interesting powers, I’m hopeful for this one.

Nick: Oh man, Beyond: Two Souls takes all the promise of non-combat and interesting story line and throws it away with third-person cover shooter combat. And its coming from Quantic Dream, so its going to be even WORSE. Continue reading

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Screen-Shaped E3: EA

Chris: You cannot fathom the dread I have going into this press conference. YOU ARE NOT PREPARED.


Nick: I am always prepared. My body is ready. Continue reading

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Screen-Shaped E3: Microsoft

Scott: Hello all! Scott here, Co-Founder of Screen-Shaped Eyes.

Chris: Hello everyone, I’m Chris Matyskiel, senior editor. I’m betting this will be ugly.

Nick: Hey everybody, this is Nick Nguyen, podcast person. Its 9 am, I can’t think of a better title. My body is ready for the abuse that will be Microsoft E3. Commenting on an unseen moment, Microsoft has delayed their press conference by 30 more minutes. Perhaps someone finally told them that they did not, in fact, knock it out of the park at the hardware announcement. Continue reading

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Choose Your Own Gamebook #2

Welcome to part two of our look at gamebooks. In part one, we looked at Adventure Gamebooks (AGs) that incorporate Branching Points and RPG aspects into one compact and enjoyable book. Even though Adventures are the most popular of the three, it would be ridiculous to overlook what BP and RPG have to offer. They each have their own fantastic series that are definitely worth your time and are guaranteed to arouse your intrigue.


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Tap Trainee™: A Beginner’s Guide to iOS Gaming

Are you a Tap Trainee™? Follow my wonderful guide and I, Lucas Bert, shall show you the way into a magical world where you’ll no longer have to stumble through the App Store, playing games which are more in-app purchases than anything else. Indeed, I will point you through to the best games on iOS, and it will be a beautiful experience for all.


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EA Stops Paying For Guns, and Why You Shouldn’t Be Proud of Them

Well, Electronic Arts has announced that it’s no longer going to pay to licence guns and accessories from manufacturers. Gun control advocates cheered, and most gamers didn’t care. All in all, it wasn’t so much a careful step or public relations coup so much as it was a brief pause in a seemingly endless parade of stupidity. 20130307-214334.jpg For those not in the know, EA licensed weapons from real-life manufacturers for use in Medal of Honor: Warfighter and other games. Now, aside from the ongoing debate in the US over gun rights, why does this matter? Well, for one thing, it’s the reason your games are expensive. Continue reading

Closing Ranks: Why We Need to Be Like BSN

It’s a well-known fact that publishers and developers have a simple if effective manner of dealing with discontent with their player bases: if they don’t say anything, eventually the ire will ebb away. Players will be distracted by other releases, placated by out-and-out bribes, or simply calm down and just be bitter. It’s not that these publishers and studio’s don’t deserve to be forgiven for things like Aliens: Colonial Marines, Diablo III and Duke Nukem Forever- they need to do things to earn that forgiveness, forever. If they don’t, players need to remember the actions of studios when making their next purchase.


So what does any of this have to do with one of the strangest, loudest communities in gaming?

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Reloading: Infinite Possibilities, One Course of Action

This goes without saying, but heavy spoilers for Bioshock: Infinite. You have been warned.

When THIS is your protagonist's biggest claim to fame...

When this is your protagonist’s biggest claim to fame…

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